Saturday, December 22, 2007


Christmas time is near. Who said that Christmas is not about gifts? Only when you love, you’ll give. And because of LOVE, a precious gift is given to us many many years ago.

A gift of HOPE.
The Biblical definition of "hope" is "confident expectation." Hope is a firm assurance regarding things that are unclear and unknown (Romans 8:24-25; Hebrews 11:1,7). Hope is a fundamental component of the life of the righteous (Proverbs 23:18). Without hope, life loses its meaning (Lamentations 3:18, Job 7:6) and in death there is no hope (Isaiah 38:18, Job 17:15). The righteous who trust or put their hope in God will be helped (Psalm 28:7) and they will not be confounded, put to shame, or disappointed (Isaiah 49:23). The righteous who have this trustful hope in God have a general confidence in God's protection and help (Jeremiah 29:11), and are free from fear and anxiety (Psalm 46:2-3).

Yup, that’s the theme for this Christmas in my church, a gift of hope.
His love is unfailing, He came, He gave, and He saves.
Gave us the purpose to live for, give us the hope in life.

The famous story, talking about The Birth of Jesus, The Shepherds and the Angels.
-“Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you; he is Christ the Lord.”
-"Glory to God in the highest, and on earth peace to men on whom his favor rests."

But don’t let it merely be a story that you hear once in a year, lets treasure the real purpose of it and share it with those around. It’s a gift for us even before we are born. A gift that is meant to be shared, a gift that is enough for all, a gift that will never disappoint, a gift that will overflow.

Along with faith and love, hope is an enduring virtue of the Christian life (1 Corinthians 13:13) and love springs from hope (Colossians 1:4-5). Hope produces joy and peace in believers through the power of the Spirit (Romans 12:12, 15:13). Paul attributes his apostolic calling to the hope of eternal glory (Titus 1:1-2). Hope in the return of Christ is the basis for believers to purify themselves in this life (Titus 2:11-14, 1 John 3:3).

A child is born, we can now continue to have love, faith and hope. What better gift can there be?
Here’s a nice song that we often sing. Titled A GIFT. Not a new song but its certainly a good one.






Let’s receive this precious priceless gift and treasure it together. The best gift you could ever have.

Merry Jolly CHRISTMAS everyone!!! =D

Tuesday, December 04, 2007

Wherever I am, You are there

When I feel helpless, You help me.
When I am sad, You comfort me.
When I am lost, You found me.
When I am lonely, You are beside me.
When I am down, You hear me out.
When I am happy, You bring more joy.

You love me,
You know me,
You fill me,
You complete me,
You care for me.

What else do I want more?
I know that no matter what happens,
You are always watching over me! =D

Sunday, December 02, 2007

Keep the house clean!!!

Me dun like tiny flies,
Me dun like fly eggs,
Me certainly dun like cleaning them..

Me dun wanna live in a place full of rubbish,
Me wan a clean place,
Me no need an expensive place,
Me having a clean place will be good enough.

Me have clean place, Me healthy.
Me healthy, Me happy.
Me happy, Me study =D

* Broken English....

Friday, November 16, 2007

Evaluation time

There are times that we just feel uneasy; something is playing in our mind. But the worst is we don’t know what the thing that is bothering us is.

1. What comes first in our life? Well, the answer is of cause God. But often, when people start serving, and be too engrossed, they might loose focus or I would like to say focusing on the wrong thing. With me, it all started with God - serving Him, doing His work, just happy being there with Him. But at times, it feels like I’m trying to please other people rather than Him. But we can connect the situation like, that person loves Him, so if you help that person, indirectly, you are pleasing Him. What I mean is that the things we are doing is not wrong, but we still do it out of the inconvenience, they might not know, but I’m pretty sure that He knows what’s in our heart. But are we really trying to please Him or please human? Often, we need to just sit down and evaluate.

2. Practice makes perfect. But when you are practicing the wrong thing, you’ll be perfectly doing the wrong thing. And in the long run, it’ll turn into routine and before you know it, it’ll be a habit. For example, when someone wants to play guitar, he has minimum knowledge of what is going on. If he continues to practice the wrong way, he’ll be the guitarist that is perfectly playing in the wrong beat all the time. And all his practices are some sort of useless. All he needs is someone good to be able to take some time out and teach. And when he practices the right thing, with the same amount of time, he might turn into a good guitarist. All I’m saying is that if we practice the right thing, we can be a master of it and when we practice the wrong thing, we might turn out to be the master of disaster. So, maybe we should sit down and evaluate if we are practicing the right things in life.

3. Everything in life had been easy for you. You have been the most popular person around, you have been the smartest person around, and everyone loves you. What if one day, when you go to a new place, everyone ignores you, all that you do is insignificant to them, you are not as smart as you used to be and things around seem to fall apart, and suddenly, you are a nobody. Well, it will be quite an impact I would say. But never the least, just be yourself, do the things that is good and continue to walk the righteous way. People noticing our presence is not that important after all. When no one is watching, we know that He’ll be there to lead us, guide us, and is always there for us. Maybe its time for us to sit down and evaluate our actions and if you’re right, don’t change for the sake of fitting in.

* Am finally back home. Having lots of time to evaluate and ponder about the things that have been going around. Sometimes, in our hectic lives, we might want to take some time out and just look at things around. Maybe there are more good around that you think there are.

Thursday, November 15, 2007

Second last paper for the year

Second last paper today =D. It has been some time now since my exams started. There’s just something within, troubling, confusing, can’t be explained.

Well, maybe this is just a phase that everyone has to go through. But I know that as long as I continue to have faith and continue to trust, He will indeed provide the best for each and everyone of us. But its His timing. Just continue to wait upon Him patiently.

Am going back to Ipoh today, a place where everything is planned out for you, a place where you know that everyone cares, a place you know that they will be by your side when you are down, a place where you know that anything comes your way, people around you will defend and support you till the very end. A place where you know that love is everywhere, a place where you can be still, a place that you can rest, a place where you can call HOME. =D

Wednesday, November 14, 2007

New day,
New beginning!!!
It will be a great and fruitful day!!!
I will rejoice and be glad in it. =D
Thank God for all that He had restored for me =D
All i need to do is step out and proclaim it.
Today will indeed be a good day!!!
I believe!!!
I hope and I have faith!!!

Yesterday is history
And history is miles away
So leave it all behind you
Let it always remind you of the day
The day that love made history

You know you can't stay right where you fell
The hardest part is forgiving yourself
But let's take a walk into today
And don't let your past get in the way

Matthew West (HISTORY)

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

I like physics.
I like Subang.
I like the weather.
I like the house.
I like the library.
I like you.
I like myself.

A thinking of a person who is about to go crazy or a person who looks at things positively?

Monday, November 12, 2007


Don't think about anything else!!!
Just focus!!!
I say focus!!!
I'm focusing!!!
Yeap, keep telling yourself that!!!
Oooi, focus!!!
... focus lar...!!!
k k .. Focus!!!
Focusing to focus!!!
Ya lar... focus!!!

Sunday, November 11, 2007


“I realized that you don’t like to make decisions”

How can someone make a decision when you know that all your current choices will lead to nothing but miseries?
How can you make a choice when you have totally no knowledge about the situation? or limited knowledge?
How can you make a decision when you know that either party will get hurt? Or will be offended.

But then in life, there are many times that we have to decide in life. And we have to live with the consequences. Its not fair to leave it to others to make decisions in your life. Learn to make decisions, learn to take responsibilities. Learn to set the pros and cons and make decisions even though you have to live with the cons. If everything is as easy as a pancake, where’s the excitement anyways?

It always seems easier when we don’t have to make a decision. But life goes on, and the decisions we make now determines our future. Thanks for that statement and thanks for reminding.

Saturday, November 10, 2007


I don't want to stay here anymore... i just want to go home!!!


Voice 1:
What good are you here? It makes no difference. Where is the restart button? Or even better, the delete button in life. You have done nothing much but brought people heart ache and miseries into their life. What’s the point of being good to everyone when you yourself are not feeling good? You’ve been a hypocrite without any personalities. You’ve done many things that you know you shouldn’t have done. Quit trying to be good. Quit smiling when you’re sad. Quit being good to people. Its not like they can’t live without you. Stop trying to be a good person. There are more outside then the naïve world that you are living in. You’ve been weak since you came here. You never cried back then. What made you a weakling? What’s good of you when you still perform badly even after so much effort and planning and preparation? I just want to leave this place. What would it be like if you have never come here? All your close friends are leaving one by one anyways. There’s no one here that really cares, they have their own life to live. Perhaps its time for you to leave this place as well. Nothing worth dwelling. Anyways, this place always makes you sick. Just leave everything behind. Don’t bother, not a single soul will even realize.

Voice 2:
Think about all the good things that had happened here. Think about all the awesome people around. Those who are forever encouraging and will always spend time and be with you. Think about how you’ve grown spiritually since you came here. Think about all the people that were happy because of you. Think about the difference you have made. You’re not weak, you’re improving. Your time here might be a challenge but you will surely have a year of increase ahead. Continue to believe. Continue to have faith and hope. Continue to give. Continue to take responsibilities. You know you can’t turn back time but you can surely make up for the lost time. There are still many friends here. You have everything here. Everything is provided for you. What else do you expect more? Learn to be thankful. Learn to have commitment. Learn from your mistakes and stop criticizing yourself. Continue to live happily and make the best out of the time you have left here.

There are many voices telling us different things in life. How we feel and act often depends on which voices we follow… But for now, I just want to go HOME!!! It’s a peaceful place where you know that all things are planned out for you and that you have nothing to worry about.

Friday, November 09, 2007

Decision Making

There are many things in life that lead us to make decisions. How to decide? For whom your decisions are based upon? What is the solution?

Do upon others what you want others to do unto you.
You know that this is not what you want people to treat you if future. But your decision might bring benefits to others. Hurting one person deeply and pleasing others, can this be justified? What is ‘correct decision?’ Of cause it first has to be pleasing in God’s eyes. After that, which come next - Our close ones, or the third party, or me?

But there are pros and cons in all decisions we make. Are we supposed to make the decision that pleases the most people? Are we supposed to make the decision that brings us most benefit? Are we suppose to make the decision based on the long run and short run cost and benefit – private and external? Or do we just let it be and follow the flow? Well, different situation requires different ways of handling it. We can come to the same conclusion despite the different route taken. However, the journey taken does matter.

Sometimes things might be hard to decide. Are our decisions being disrespectful, arrogant, selfish, hypocritical … haih… Its just hard to please everyone, especially when all sides are neutral. I realized that from every different angle you look, there are just different translations of our actions. Even history is different based on who is telling the story.

Study the people God brought into your life. Some need encouragement, time, space, affirmation… It takes an unselfish person to do this upon other person. If every of your friend needs half an hour from you everyday. What is the maximum level of friends you can fit in then? Of cause we can’t calculate it this way. But some choices we make tend to push some away and bring some closer to us.

Simple things we do can make a great difference. A simple explanation will keep us out of lots of troubles. Much of this can be avoided when we are able to make a simple and firm decision.

To be bad for once or to feel bad forever? To satisfy which party? There is always opportunity cost. Who should we seek direction from? 1. God (are we actually listening?) 2. Our family. 3. Our leaders. 4. Our trusted friend.

Some decisions just take longer time to make – for example, who to marry, how to budget for the year… But some should take a shorter time – what to eat, what time should I sleep… But some are just stuck in the grey area.

Conclusion, the longer we drag, the more difficult the situation MIGHT turn out to be. Make a firm decision and be committed to it.

Wednesday, November 07, 2007

Little things in Life

Human just like to complain. The hundreds of good things you do for them, they sometimes just rather remember the few wrongs you did. Haih…
Learn!!! Learn to see even the small things that people do. Don’t just complain!!! People might be tired hearing us complain day and night.
And when the things has pass, just let it go. Don’t keep it in your mind forever. Something are good to remember. But people’s fault, as long as they are willing to change, don’t penalize them if they accidentally do it once or twice, as long as they are aware of it.
Sometimes, we tend to overlook the good things people do for us. They do it everyday, it becomes a habit. And we often forget to thank them. it has become such a usual routine that we often overlooked their kindness.
But that’s not the real thing I want to share.

Here’s just something I wanted to share:
That day, my dad was driving us back to Ipoh. I always fall asleep in the car. Every time we travel, I will just doze off. This time, it was night. Well, its not the first time we travel at night, in fact, we do it very often. But this time, I tried to stay up for the whole journey. TRIED. It wasn’t easy. I think I dose off here and there and eventually fell asleep. Only then I realize that its not an easy thing to drive a long journey, especially at night. Everything left and right seems the same. Not easy to focus and stay alert the whole journey.
I was just amazed. Every time I get into the car, I know that I’ll reach my destination safely. And as time pass, I took it for granted.
I’ll always say thank you after every journey. Often, it was said too easily. I mean, you are brought up saying it. So its basically already programmed in you.
Such a wonderful thing people do for us. =D
Am just so so so blessed =D

Sunday, November 04, 2007


[Verse One:]
All things are possible for you
All things are possible
Nothing's too difficult for you
Nothing's to difficult
I'm ready for change
Ready for rain
Ready for favor I know you able to

Turn it around
Open the windows of Heaven
Pour out a blessing overflow
Turn it around
Open the windows of Heaven
Pour out a blessing
We cannot contain
Let it rain
Let it rain

You have turned
My mourning to dancing
You've turned
My sorrow to joy
You have turned
My whole life around
Thank you
Thank you Lord

Thursday, November 01, 2007

Lagging life

We are loved we cared.
Some more than the others.
It’s up to us to choose how we want to live.

Hit when the iron is hot.
Don’t let opportunities escape.

Carpe diem,
Seize the day!!
Play hard, Study hard, work hard and pray hard!!!

Draw the line now, look at it clearly.
Make sure that we’ll be far better then where we are now.

Release ourselves from any bondage,
Proclaim the blessing set ahead.

Choose to live an abundant life!!!

* My mind has been lagging these few days. Maybe because there are too many routines going on. Maybe I’m just lazy. Maybe … Wake UP!!! Look ahead!!! No point regretting later. Set your Focus right!!!

Monday, October 29, 2007

Time Of Change

It might be hard to let go,
it might be hard to face the fact,
it might be hard to think,
it might be hard to wait.

Are we willing to sacrifice?
Are we willing to evaluate?
Are we willing to set things right?
Are we willing to face the consequences?

Is this really glorifying Him?
Is this what I want for my life?
Is this the right move?
Is this the best that have to be done?

Why can’t the answer be clear?
Why can’t there be only 1 choice?
Why can’t I just remain?
Why can’t someone decide for me?

Maybe the best is to wait
Maybe there is a happily ever after.
Maybe I can really walk on water.
Maybe that’s the right path.

Up grade to a better future
Down to a better path
Left behind are those miseries
Right to the path where God leads

*there might be some part of life that we know that things have to change. We know that what is going on is not right. But we are often not willing to change. What are we afraid off? Are we afraid of what people around us will think about us? Are we afraid to leave our comfort zone? Are we afraid to take up the challenge?

“Why does the past always seem safer?
Maybe because at least we know me made it
And why do we worry about the future?
When every day will come just the way the Lord ordained it.”
(Chris Rice – 8th grade)

Friday, October 26, 2007

I'm a WORM

I’m a worm.
You might see me,
You might not.

I’m a worm,
Too much of me,
I’m in your mood.
Without me,
It won’t be good.

I’m a worm,
I’m everywhere.

I’m a worm,
Living in you.

I’m a worm,
Not letting you go.

I’m a worm,
Eat eat and eat.

I’m a worm,
Jaw worm,
Always smiling.

I’m a warm,
Tongue worm,
Talking non-stop.

I’m a worm,
Peanut worm,
But I can think.

I’m a worm,
Arrow Worm,
Always watching.

I’m a worm,
Ribbon worm,
Brings colour into life.

I’m a worm..

Listen to the silence

People come, people go,
Houses built, trees gone,
River flow, rubbish filled,
Nations flourish, nations fall,
Being part of it yet not understanding it.
But life goes on.

Actions taken, cannot be undone,
Words said cannot be kept back.
But there is still hope, hopefully,
Struggling to get out of struggle,
Staying alert dodging troubles.

Broken glass cannot be mended,
A new one might not be the same.
Trials comes lesson learned,
Series of uncertainty are tackled.
The choices are in our hand.

When all seem dim,
Find the light,
When all seem lost,
Ask for direction.
When all are gone,
Look forward.
Keep holding on.
He will lead.

The light is the brightest when all are dark.
The color is brought out when all are pale.
The voice is the loudest around silence.
The power is strongest when we are weak.
Faith is stretched when we are challenged.

Too many choices,
Too many decisions,
Too many uncertainties,
Could the best step be not doing anything?
Just listen.
The unspoken words,
The leafy path,
Maybe it’s the path,
It’s the path,
The path we never noticed.
Learn to listen in the silence.
He will provide.
No worries.

Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Walking on a log

What comes into your mind when you see a dad carrying his son walking on a log in water, performing? Father and son. He later turned around and rolled the other way with his son on his shoulders. I saw this article on the papers but can’t seem to find the same picture.

Do we applause and say, wow, what a good performance. Stand there, amazed by what was going on.
Or do we see
The great crowd around
Or do we see
The way he is able to balance and try to calculate in physical term the reason he can walk on such a log
Or are we just
Staring to see if he is going to fall, are we there to try to find fault
Or do we see
The struggle, the tension upon the man that he is trying his best to give his best performance to the audience
Or do we see
The little boy, naïve, not knowing what is happening around
Or do we see
A irresponsible, putting his son in great risk
Or do we see
The effort of a father, trying to make ends meet for the family? The unwillingness of him risking his son’s life but have to do so just to make a few pennies per day. The heart of the father, that he is trying his best not to drop his son. The unwritten story about his family. The hope in him that there will be a better future for his family.

We often see what is on the surface. But do we really know what is inside? Some might me smiling all the time, is that who they are inside? Some might treat you badly, is this the way they are trying to make you tougher? Some may keep a distance from you, is this the way they are trying to ask you to put more effort if you want to keep this friendship? Different people have their own point of view. In the same way, the stories in HISTORY depends on who is telling the story. But who is there to judge?

Monday, October 22, 2007


Waking up from a nightmare, can’t sleep back, but it is still early.

It caught me thinking, what do we do when we know that everyone around us are doing the things that are not right? Weird = being the add one out from the norm. Being the weird one around, how do we make a change? Of cause it will be easier to follow the flow. For certain things, I would actually follow the flow. But what about the things that you know it is bad. Bad. Bad.
Well, since everyone is doing the same thing, it doesn’t make it right. But after compromising, it might fall into the gray spot. But sometimes, we just know that we can’t compromise. If we start, it will trigger the start of a big down fall.
No character? Sometimes we just have to make our stand.
Logical thinking, counting the pros and cons, it is certainly more worth it to stand with the majority. But as all CBA(cost-benefit analysis), we have to start putting shadow pricing. What is the price of losing a big group of your friends? What is the price of standing up for what you think is right? What is the price of the difference that you might make in the future?
Many times in life we compromise too much. Knowing that what we do is wrong, but not wrong in society. Knowing that what our friends are doing is wrong, but we can’t change them. Knowing that we have to do and not doing it. But KNOWING and DOING is different!!!
Of cause in all cases that we seem to be the odd one out, seem to be the only one believing in what we believe, seem to be fighting alone. WE ARE NOT ALONE.
It will not be easy for us the stand up and make a difference. But we will not be alone doing it. We might be the minority, but at least we know that we are doing the right thing.

Perseverance is important. The start might be difficult. But we must persevere so that we might be mature and complete.

How is this related with my dream? I just can’t forget the last scene, everyone looking at me like I’m a total weirdo. Its not easy to have people looking at us like that but we have to do what we have to do. The cost in the short run might be very taxing but do we not see what the long run benefit would be?

Confucius: Quotes on Making a DifferenceTo put the world right in order, we must first put the nation in order; to put the nation in order, we must first put the family in order; to put the family in order, we must first cultivate our personal life; we must first set our hearts right.

Sunday, October 21, 2007

Pleasing people?

I don’t know the key to success, but the key to failure is definitely to please everybody.
-Bill Cosby-

Really? My friend just read to me, from some personality test, “you are easy to get along, people will like you, but you lack personality”. Hmmm… really?
But when we care, when we love, when we are concern, do we not try our best to please them?

I know we don’t study for our parents. But do we not try to do the things that they like? Do we not stay out of trouble and not make them worry? Do we not do our best is studies, do we not call home, do we not do the things that is pleasing to their eyes?

But of cause in the mist of doing these things we must have discernment and not follow blindly.

What about when it comes to friends? Even though it is inconvenient for us, we will still go an extra mile to care for them. Spending time with them when they are down, being with them when they are lonely, take care of them when they are sick… so many things that we do to please them, or at least we think will please them…

But is it really very hard to please everyone? It also depends on the company you mix with. Everyone smoke, do you follow just to please them? They are big spender, do you follow them? They go to indecent places and dresses unpleasantly… If we try to please them by following them, are we not foolish?

Please everyone, not possible? But I think we should try our best to please our love ones, those we care about. And WALK IN LOVE =D

*Question :
3 big problems in life, first, being relationships, second being health, third being finances.

Thursday, October 18, 2007

Christmas is near =D

Is it too early to think about Christmas? Christmas is not all about snow, pine tree, present, reindeer, santa… its more about giving. Is it not better to see the smile on other’s face?

What do we really want for Christmas?

What can we give this Christmas?

For those who are away from home, Christmas is all in the heart =D

There is nothing wrong with preparing a long long list and trying to post it to North Pole though. =D

Can I wish everyone Merry Christmas now? Hmmm… might freak them out. Hehhehehe…. Maybe sometime later. =D

Really can’t wait for Christmas. I know that this Christmas will never be the same. Something is going to happen, something good. Keeping my hopes high =D

Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Long Distance Relationships

Can it come to past? Will it be the same? Distance, Will it build or will it destroy? Well, too many conditions to consider. Too many factors affecting it.

What do we need?
Trust, faithfulness, hope, love, faith, perseverance, patience, commitment, time, friends, family… etc etc…

My friend just told me, no matter how busy you are, you have to communicate with the other individual.
For those out there who are having long distance relationship, Gambateh!!! It can work!!! Find ways of effective communication. Let the distance be a test for this relationship. View it as a relationship with a high enthalpy change without any catalyst. Even graphite can turn into diamond. Nothing is impossible =D

Physics, couple = 2 forces which are same in magnitude but opposite in direction, whose line of action does not coincide.
So even the direction is not the same, it will still take both to make a rotational motion, which can be viewed as the circle of life. =D

But can I say that if you are not willing to commit, DON’T START!!! But who am I to say it? =D

But remember, God is still the center.

But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Matt 6:33

Monday, October 15, 2007

Here In My Life

I have never walked on water
Felt the waves beneath my feet
But at Your word Lord
I receive Your faith
To walk on oceans deep
And I remember
How You found me
In that very same place
All my failings
Surely would have drowned me
But You made a way

You are my freedom
Jesus You’re the reason
I’m kneeling again at Your throne
Where would I be
Without You here in my life
Here in my life

You have said that all the heavens
Sing for joy at one who finds
The way to freedom
Truth of Jesus
Bought from death into His life
And I remember
How You saw me
Through the eyes of Your grace
And though the cost was
Your beloved for me
Still You made a way

You are my freedom
Jesus You’re the reason

*This is a very lovely song =D Freedom!!! He's the reason =D

Morning Prayer Group

This is my college’s lovely prayer group. I have been part of it since I came to college. Started as a very small group behind the cafeteria and then later on towards the end of 2006, we found out that there is another group gathered at SAM’s garden. Merging the prayer group made it much bigger. =D

I’ve been consistent for quite some time but was missing in action for a few months, about July till early Sept. But in the mid of September, something keeps on bugging me… there’s like a voice in my head or maybe its my conscience… but it is sure a good one. It brought me back to prayer group. Explaining why I stop going, I can’t really explain it too. Too many things came crashing at my doorstep. Only a few tend to be able to see it though. Maybe I build the wall too high, maybe I just don’t want them to worry, maybe I just feel safer when I handle things my way, or even maybe I just like to keep it to myself.

I soon came to realize that it is not about me. It is about the testimony that I’ll be. It’s about if I can glorify His name with my actions. I realized that getting too used to the surrounding might not be a good thing. We might be standing there serving, but is our heart really there? Many times we need to evaluate ourselves. Are we doing for the right purpose? Is it right in the eyes of God? Or am I doing it because of the sense of duty? Is smiling outside means that we are alright in the inside? I always feel better after a long long time of prayer. Come humbly before the Lord is very important. Just pouring out everything to Him. Its hard to stand up alone. But sometimes, when we are alone only then we can see the whole picture. We can see what went wrong. But He is always watching over us. Every time when I feel like a failure, I know that he will lift me up again.

There were too many things on my mind. But I just realized that the more we try to take control, the more it will add to our burden. The harder we try, the more complicated it feels. I know that He has a plan for me, a plan even beyond my imagination. Maybe for certain things, it is better for me not think about it, He will provide when the time is right. Maybe for certain things I need to put in more effort. Maybe for certain things I need to spend more time doing it.

Many people see the surface of things. But I know that He sees the inside.

1 My soul finds rest in God alone;
my salvation comes from him.
2 He alone is my rock and my salvation;
he is my fortress, I will never be shaken.

Psalms 62:1-2

Saturday, October 13, 2007

Econs and Chem in relationship

What would you do when 2 or more people are coming after you? Knowing that they are all good people, not wanting to hurt anyone’s feeling, who should you choose or how do you choose?
Knowing that your current bf which you have known for about 2 years, who is loving, caring, but you often have much fight, misunderstanding, lack of trust and faith. But yet, the time spent, the things that you have been through, the love that you experience, the things that you are willing to sacrifice for him, you can never forget it.
One the other hand came an almost perfect guy, smart, honest, always willing to care and is always there when you needed help. One that you know for certain will not let you down, one that will surely be there in time of need, one that has a bright future in front of him.
What should the girl do? Wanting to be friends with guy2 might be giving him false hope might send the wrong signal to him, but she doesn’t want to risk her friendship. Yet somewhere is her, she is uncertain of how she feels about him. So, what should she do? To be unfaithful or to be realistic? Economics coming in, to take into account of the long run cost and benefits, to take into account the opportunity cost... But make a decision, don't leave both of them hanging...

And as a friend, what advice should we give?
Are we suppose to draw out a CBA(cost-benefit analysis)? Is there protectionism? What about the diplomatic relations?
Maybe the Hess’ Law is applied here. (A chemical reaction is the same whether the change is brought about in one stage or through intermediate stages. In other words, you will come to the same ending no matter which route you are taking.)
Will it be easier to choose your partner is formula is given? For example you can solve it by using E=mc2?
[the elements of pray, follow the word of God, seek for guidance, ask more matured people about their opinion should be included as well…etc…etc…]

*Just some random economics and chemistry added into BGR. =D


This is very interesting, because here is the place where people point out your wrongs. There is nothing wrong to tell a person that he/she is not good enough, that what they are doing is wrong, and that you can’t stand what they are doing.

Well, in the process of doing so, we have to take care of what they are feeling. But this doesn’t mean telling them that settling for second best is ok.

Which do we prefer?
1. “Hey, you did badly this time; I think you are not putting enough effort. Why don’t you try spending more time and buck up on your skills?”
2. “Hey, you didn’t do that bad. I’m sure you’ll do be much more skillful as day pass by.”

Well, both carry the same meaning. But which one will give the individual a push, an urge to do better?

Doing this, we have to look at different individuals as well. As in if they will take it in a positive way or what we say is going to discourage them. There are many factors that have to be taken into account as we are talking. Out of our mouth come the thoughts of our heart.

We, as the person that is listening have to take all accusations and opinion positively. There is always room for improvement. They are not trying to put us down; these are just pointers to help us to be a better being.

Are we some times not truthful enough? Maybe we are trying to care about their feelings; we do not want to say anything that may jeopardize the relationship. But come to think about it, the more you care, the more we are suppose to encourage each other and hope for them to improve.

But this doesn’t mean that whatever they say is 100% correct. We are also given wisdom to discern. We have to think for our own and not follow blindly. If what they say is correct, change, learn from our mistake. This might not take place in a day or two. It might take a long time but when there’s a will there’s always a way. But if what they say is not right, stand up for our own right.

There are many opinions on different things. The way we look at things might be different. Evaluation is a good way to see if we are on the right track. Looking for room of improvements and working towards it. =D

Thursday, October 11, 2007

Chain Of Incidents

What else can go wrong? I was very home sick yesterday, everyone is going home for Raya, at least most of them. But that is not the story for today.
Today was the first day of exam, pretty exciting, woke up later then usual. Going into the lab, all set, the reagents are all on my table as they only have limited space in the lab and was left lift with little place to work with.
I sort of started the “breaking chain”. First, I broke the burette, then my Bunsen burner was not functioning, then later the specimen bottle broke. Later, my lab partner on the tap and my paper was wet. The reagents given were not enough and I needed more. Later, I realized that I was running out of time and started writing the wrong stuff on my paper. What more can go wrong?
Maybe I wasn’t prepared enough for the paper. Maybe I wasn’t focus enough. Maybe I was just too slow. Maybe I am just not smart enough. But in everything, there is surely something to be thankful about. hmmm... I’m just glad that no one was hurt throughout the experiments and that at least I finished the paper.
What a way to start the exam…

Then came the question from Azeim, what if we can’t make it? What if we can’t fly? What if we can’t meet the requirement…

Tuesday, October 09, 2007


It has been some time since I last read a book from page to page besides my magazines and text books. This is a very interesting book, the initial reason I read it is because I borrowed it for too long and it isn’t so good to return without reading it. But after a while, I slowly feel in love in the book. Sitting in the library thinking, should I do chemistry or finish this book first. So I finally decided to read the book for the first 15 minutes I step into the library. Is there such thing as book addict? How I wish it could happen to my chemistry book as well too. ;p

I like the content of the book. It is about “God as the center”. The term courtship is nothing new to me, everyone who knows Uncle Jason will know this term. But after reading this book, it caught me thinking; it brought my thoughts a step further, it’s written in a very simple manner and yet carries much truth in it.

Well, the one thing that I really agree is that we must be patient. Don’t rush!!! Even tough I often rush in under many circumstances – work, studies, learning… but this is something rushing 100% won’t help. There is nothing wrong with starting the relationship being just friends, in that way, we can be more of ourselves. It is good to wait upon the Lord. with beautiful leaves and abundant fruit, providing food for all, giving shelter to the beasts of the field, and having nesting places in its branches for the birds of the air. What more us? I know God has a plan for each and everyone of us.
Some friends might come to us when they face relationship problems. We try our best to listen and encourage in ways that we can.

I really thank God for pulling me back as I pass the line, went over the limit. He loves us!!! As long as we repent, learn from our lesson and learn to lean on Him, He will be there for us. Having regrets, feeling the guilt, what can I do? It is not that easy to forget, but our faults may be a reminder to us in our future and by His grace we can get up, having a new chance to live a new life.

After reading this book, looking around, there are actually not many who follow courtship. What can we do when we know our friends are not doing the right thing? They have known each other for years and we are just old strangers or new friends to them. So far, I only know of a few that are willing to take courtship seriously, or plan to have one. Percentage wise, I can say it is lest then 1%. But I know that if they continue seek and pray faithfully, God will indeed provide the best for them.

There is no such thing as 1 way for a long lasting relationship. But for all those out there who are still single, still seeking, courtship is certainly a good formula to have a happy and long relationship leading to marriage. =D

Monday, October 08, 2007

Do everything in love

I found it, I found it =D

Here’s a verse that I saw about 2 weeks ago. But I did not bookmark it and was searching for it for quite some time. And finally, I found it =D

Do everything in love.
1 Corinthians 16 : 14

It’s a very short verse. But it is very meaningful. Think about it, if everyone does everything in love, won’t this place be a much better place to live in?

Saturday, October 06, 2007

What will you choose?

Make everyone happy by doing what they like
Be happy yourself but disliked by others

Sleep when you are extremely tired
Stay awake to help your friend throughout the night

Telling straight to your friend that you don’t agree with them
Just compromise and try to make them happy

Save up a few meals so that you are able to bless others
Just eat, not that they are expecting much for us anyways

Tell the person you like them and risking the friendship
Be happy for them even when they are with others

Being in a funeral to console your friend
Appear in you long planned birthday

Speaking out your thoughts not caring that you’ll hurt others
Keep quite and contain the debates in our own heart

To be happy
To see people happy

Disturb others when you are bored
Stay bored and let them use their time more usefully?

* These are random stuff that doesn’t really make much sense and is written when I’m half asleep.

Friday, October 05, 2007

Unknown Ringing

“Ring Ring… Ring Ring… Ring Ring” I just wish that I can pick up this call and find out who’s on the other side of the line. Is this a chat room or a direct phone call from one individual? Well, this is an invisible phone, just something in my head, I think its my conscience. Or is it my imagination? Or … I’m also not sure. Its just that random thoughts and random action just take place nowadays.

Having two random people who doesn’t know each other telling me the same thing. DEATH! Well, is death just statistics? Well, when we open our newspaper, it does come in numbers if that is what it means. The thing that these two individuals pointed out and asked me a similar question. “What do you what to be remembered as when you die?” I have heard these countless time since I don’t remember when. I always thought that it is just been a normal topic to motivate you, telling you that you can’t control the time so make the best out of it… don’t have any regrets when you pass away. I’m not sure why, but something is not right, why is it running around in my brain? Why can’t it just settle in the neuron and stay there?

The second ringing, it’s the Jabez prayer. I know this prayer by heart, since young, my mum always recite it to me. Two more individuals’ sort of touch on this topic and once again, why is it running around in my head? Am I supposed to learn something? Or know something? Is there a hidden meaning that I should know of? Is there a easier solution or calculation that I can use or is there a formula that I have not learned? All things are connected one way or another. But are these just random thoughts or is there something that I need to take note of?






Well, I can’t really read everything above but I’m sure the copy and paste is correct. =D

The third ring in my head… Well, time is running out, will share more in the future ;p

Thursday, October 04, 2007








*different songs speak to us in different ways. are these just words to us? or are these commitment, assurence, and promises we are making? in this song, 'MY GREATEST HONOR WILL ALWAYS BE TO SERVE MY LORD AND KING' it really hit me when i was about to give up serving, only then i realised that the fact that we are able to serve, we are blessed. I mean, how did this thought even come into my mind? My cell leader talked to me, the song spoke to me, and the bible showed me. We might have negative thoughts in times of trials. God speak to us in different ways. I did not see a shining light that speaks. We might look alright from the outside and everyone thinks that we are doing fine. But when the time comes, God will indeed speak into us and will actually make us fine. And when we sing 'FOREVER AND EVER JESUS YOU ALONE IN GLORY REIGN FOREVER AND EVER WITH YOU I WALK THIS NARROW WAY' be sure that when difficult times come, he will lead us through it. He will not put us through what we can't bare. Continue to love and obey. He' s watching over us. Yesterday, today and forevermore. =D

Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Shepherd of my soul

Shepherd of my soul I give you full control,
Wherever You may lead I will follow.
I have made the choice to listen for Your voice,
Wherever You may lead I will go.

Shepherd of my soul I give you full control,
Wherever You may lead I will follow.
I have made the choice to listen for Your voice,
Wherever You may lead I will go.

Be it in a quiet pasture or by a gentle stream,
The Shepherd of my soul is by my side.
Should I face a mighty mountain or a valley dark and deep,
The Shepherd of my soul will be my guide.

Shepherd of my soul I give you full control,
Wherever You may lead I will follow.
I have made the choice to listen for Your voice,
Wherever You may lead I will go.

* At some point of life, we might seem lost. We have regrets of what we have done. How can we undo such things? How could we be so heartless at that moment? Where have all the rational people that we are suppose to get advice from? Why did we not think before we act? Where is our self-control? What do we do when it is just too late to fix things? So lost, so down, so uncertain, so frustrating, so guilty, a heart full of repentance, do we just close an eye on the things that people says to us? Or do we act like nothing has happen? We can’t turn back time, we can’t undo certain mistakes. Committing every to Him, hoping for a better tomorrow, hoping that things won’t be the same, hoping that people will forgive, hoping that we can forgive ourselves. I choose to follow, follow where you lead me, I may not be perfect, but I know Your love will never change. That you will lead and provide for my every needs. Lost, so lost, just hoping to find the way.

*Was browsing around, and found another song, Title: Grand Prize - Shepherd Of My Soul.
Well i've never heard this song before, but the lyrics are nice though, speak right out from the heart it seems.

Is my life what You had in mind
I feel I'm falling behind
On the outside I look fine but
my heart is dark as wine
I look to You to pull me through the
quicksands of my life
So why am I lonely
Since You have risen

Be the shepherd of my soul

Oh my God what went wrong
I'm thirsty and I long to be filled
with Your love that only comes from above

Monday, October 01, 2007

Hosanna - song

Verse 1
I see the king of glory
Coming down the clouds with fire
The whole earth shakes, the whole earth shakes
I see his love and mercy
Washing over all our sin
The people sing, the people sing

Hosanna, hosanna
Hosanna in the highest

Verse 2
I see a generation
Rising up to take the place
With selfless faith, with selfless faith
I see a new revival
Staring as we pray and seek
We're on our knees, we're on our knees

Heal my heart and make it clean
Open up my eyes to the things unseen
Show me how to love like you have loved me
Break my heart for what is yours
Everything I am for your kingdom's cause
As I walk from earth into eternity

* A very lovely song, very meaningful. Didn't appreciate at first, but after listening to it for quite some time, and suddenly can't stop listening to it. =D

Sunday, September 30, 2007


Eating, sleeping, playing, praying, studying, working, surfing the net, chatting, messaging… these are some of the daily “routine” that people go through.

What will we do when suddenly these things just don’t go the way we want it to be? What will we do when we don’t have food to eat, can’t sleep, no play time, what’s next after our studies? “No internet connection in this area?”- don’t be surprised when people ask this question. Suddenly your close friend stops messaging you, what happened? You suddenly can’t focus in your work; you suddenly feel a distance away from people.

Something doesn’t go right; the first thing that comes to mind is “did I do anything wrong?”. And when we can’t find the fault, the mistake, we are troubled the whole day.

Are we too used to routine? When something doesn’t happen the way we expect it to be, we get frustrated, we ponder, and we are confused. The question of what’s next is always there…

Here’s a short story:
There is once a bunch of college student who stays together. There are close, they hardly fight, living in harmony. But no one liked to do certain chores in the house. Suddenly, one day, one of them decided that he wanted to take up the chore and do it. None of them like to do the chore, but he doesn’t mind doing it even though it might be a little troublesome. So he took up the responsibility, having the thought that doing something out of routine is nothing compared to having a house full with unhappy people when it comes to chores.
To his surprise, the housemates did not that him, but instead scolded him and said, “don’t try to be holy, we know you don’t enjoy doing this.” … >.<” Ouch, never did he thought that such words will come out from their mouth. He wasn’t even hoping for a big thank you but he never expected such respond either.
When we do good, we do not expect something in return, but what is heartbreaking is when people think that we have motives, that we try to bribe them, that we are up to something fishy. Are these things and these thoughts disturbing? But are they going to stop us from continue doing what is right? Be strong in the grace of giving. Don’t become talkers but become doers. We might be in a situation where all around us are against us. But remember that we are created for the glory of the Lord. Do all things for His glory. We might be the odd one, but we are certainly not alone.

* story is not related to what’s written before it, just some randomness. :p

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Do people think too much?

Do smart people think too much at some point? Here’s a situation. One day, I invited a friend for a dinner with a group of four. I said, “hey hey, John asked you, asvin and I for dinner. So come along k.” it’s a normal day situation. But I was humored with the reply I got. He was saying, I have 5 theories about this invitation.

First, he really invited the 3 of us. Second, he invited you and you are bringing both of us along. Third, he invited you and you don’t want to have dinner alone with him. Forth, you are bringing me along to make someone jealous, and fifth, you have nothing to talk to him and bring me to start a conversation.

How much can a person think out of one simple question? I just laughed and replied, when I say he invited you means that he actually invited you!!!

Are we thinking all these stuff because it happens too often around us? Here is the reasoning for him to think this way. First, there is the probability of him inviting the 3 of us. Second, sometimes, people don’t feel easy comfortable being alone with another person, well, it is no harm in bringing others along as long as the other party knows about it. Third, the more the merrier, when there are more in a crowd, it will be livelier. Forth, people sometimes get close to others to make someone jealous, but we must always remember the golden rule, people has feelings as well. And fifth, when there are more people gathered around, it is easier to initiate a conversation and there are more things to talk about.

Sometimes, when we think too much, it just leads to trouble and it might make our life miserable. But on the other hand, it prepares us for the situation to come and that we will be more cautious. But in everything we do, do it out of love. Love, be it in family, friendship, people that hurt us before, maybe even to random people around us, or even people far far away that needs our help. It is good to see other people are blessed and the smile on their face. Meet a need when you see one, it doesn’t matter if it is appreciated or not, it won’t be sincere if we are expecting something in return. =D

At last, we had dinner together in Batavia. Its Indonesian food. Food is a good way of bringing people together; catching up with what was left behind, getting to know each other more… And we had a long long chat of random stuff and went home happily. =D Praise the Lord even if it’s a bumpy road that we are going through.

Tuesday, September 25, 2007

A loser?

What do we do when we feel like a loser? There are times that we fail, times that we succeed in life. But what actions can we take to overcome such things? Well, the best thing for us to do in such situation is to take a break, think of what went wrong, pray about it and work on it.

It is sometimes not that easy especially having people around us looking down on us. What more those who are close to us? Fixing the problems takes time. There are not much point fighting with them and defending ourselves. Is it not better to have patience and continue to work to overcome our failures? The best way to prove them wrong is to make sure that we succeed in the future.

We might feel down, feel that there is not much purpose in life, negative thoughts will come to us at such time. But we must stand strong and not be shaken. We need perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that we may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.

When times that we feel useless, alone, uncertain, be sure that He is always watching over us and will certainly guide us and be with us all the time.

*We are not perfect being, there are ups and downs in life. But we are over comers!!!

Monday, September 24, 2007

Year End goals =D

Its my first day of fast, fast and pray for my family and my studies =D. Not that bad, but having the urge to go online to chat on and off. Its also the first day of college, not that bad also. Well, people make their New Year resolution and work towards it. But I haven’t set much goals though, always having the mindset of if you have no goals, you have no disappointment. But well, maybe its time for a change. But this cannot be called a New Year resolution though, because its not New Year. =D maybe its just some stuff I want to do and hope to achieve. Was chatting the other day, my friend said something I it was stuck in my head since then. “Why not glorify God in everything you do?” I know this, but it just sort of keeps ringing in my brain since that statement is made. So, here are some things that I hope to achieve before I regret not doing it. In a race, all runners run, but only one will get the prize. So, we shall run in such a way that we get the prize. =D

1. Scoring in exams – well, we always talk about faith, but a man is justified by his works, not by faith alone. As a student, the best thing for now is to be a testimony is through our results.

2. Have patience – a realized that I like to rush people, but most of the time is because other people are rushing me. And I have to learn to have patience when it comes to lots of random stuff. Have my regrets and will learn to set things right.

3. Finish my book – haven’t been reading much but this book did caught my attention. Borrowed it a long long time ago but can’t seem to finish it. After reading a bit, I realized that there are many things that I don’t understand yet. (will write a blog about it after I finish reading =D)

4. Live a healthy lifestyle – well, first I have to start with a healthy diet. Our body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. Keep is healthy keep it clean!!! And some exercises will do me good as well. And have at least 4-5 hours of sleep per day.

5. Start a record of my budget – I’ve to learn to be a good steward of $$$. Was thinking back, I realized that I myself don’t spend much, but I have to keep an account of where my $ goes. (it’s amazing that I had only 2 figure in my account in mid August. But I’m still living till now, indeed He will provide when we give faithfully.) Was blessed by my dad, my mum and my sis.

Well, no point setting too many goals and not working towards it. So, this is so far 5 objectives that I will want to achieve by the end of this year!!!

Friday, September 21, 2007

Some Bugging random thoughts

1. Why would someone buy vodka knowing that he/she will never drink it? Random actions that has no explanation?

2. Why do we expect to find a perfect partner when we alone are not perfect? And when the perfect person shown up, we find that we are unworthy and back off?

3. Why do we get homesick when we just leave home for one day? Even when we have lots of activities around us.

4. Why do we smile all the time when there are actually nothing much to be happy about? And can’t even cry when we are depressed? Till no one can actually tell how we feel from the outside?

5. How do we say that we are close to God when non-Christians know the bible better then us? How can we not remember much even we have been reading the same stuff over and over again?

6. Why do we have endless chats online and have practically nothing to talk about when we meet each other? Does internet create more problems then solving?

7. Why is it that random things just appear when we say we want to focus? Why do random people appear when we have other better things to think about?

8. Why is it hard to say “no” to a close friend even if its inconvenient? Why is it more fun to see our friends being happy rather then being happy doing other things that we enjoy?

9. Why do we feel guilty when we do something wrong and when others don’t feel a thing at all? Why do we feel extremely guilty when someone is upset because of us?

10. How do we celebrate when we do well but others don’t? And how do we don’t do well when everyone else is doing well? Where will we be many years from now?

*How do we expect people to understand how we feel when we sometimes don’t understand how we ourselves feel?

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Bar B Q

Was browsing through blogs. One blog did caught my eyes, that’s Ah Fu’s blog. First time going into his blog, and I can see food food and food. =D How can someone like me who likes to eat have no food picture in my blog? But just realized that we were too busy eating and only managed to take 4 photos.

Well this dish looked interesting and looked delicious but it somehow tasted more like flour.

Its in Bar B Q, in Pyramid of cos. the food there is ok. But we enjoyed cooking!!! Some burnt, some overcooked, some not so cook, but well, at least we enjoyed it.

Well, this is a place that we can hang out for hours, just catch up, chat, and talk nonsense... heheh.. =D

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

Troubles = sleep = decisions

Some time, some part of life, we are just troubled. We can’t concentrate, can’t seem to do things right, even the simplest things we get it wrong. But we just don’t know what is troubling us. Hmmm… we just suddenly feel down, not knowing what to do next. Everything just seems wrong. We sometimes just randomly don’t feel like studying, working, doing what we normally do.

What can we do when we face these situations? Having the want to do nothing feeling, we are easily influenced. If those around us are doing drugs, drinking, clubbing, lepaking… we will tend to follow. Is this when we get into more troubles and feel stupid when we wake up?

Or what we can do is to sleep over it. Sleeping helps in many ways. When we wake up, we just seem to be calmer, everything else just seems to fade away, and we can think and decide more rationally. It gives our brain time to structure things. Put all the unnecessary things behind, and when we wake up, we can be more focus. No bad influence by anyone. No waste of time, no waste of money- instead of going bowling, pool, arcade, cyber café, movies… we are recharged when we wake up, and it is most effective when we pray right when we get up from the bed.

But eventually, the day is how we want the day to be. We decide how we want to feel. Its either we make our decisions based on emotional or rational. We can’t control everything around us, but we certainly can decide and shape our own day.

Friday, September 14, 2007

Holidaysssssss 3

Once again a day has come and goes. Hmm… not a very fruitful holiday so far. Pretty much alone in the morning and afternoon. Everyone goes to work and school. Well, when we have to go for classes, we complain and when we have too much holiday we complain too. Sometimes, come to think about it, in certain situation, we don’t treasure when we have it in hand, but we complain and get disappointed when we lose it.

Just started the walk with - MARK, again. Well, many times have I read this book. It’s the shortest among the 4 gospel. But how much do I really know about it? Reading and understanding is two different things. Maybe this holiday I shall find something different about it. Maybe a hidden meaning, maybe I could unlock an unknown secret. =D

Hmm.. getting bored and nothing much to do. My “chatting kaki” are all offline d. guess its time for me to do some stuff not in front the comp, maybe find something more useful to do. :p

Thursday, September 13, 2007

Holidayssssss 2

Holidayssssss 2

Well, its about 1.30am in the morning. Not having much to do, that’s when life gets bored I guess, we end up doing pretty much nothing, that’s why we must always keep our mind occupy!
Well, I told myself that now the important thing is to make sure I can “fly”. But having the books In front of me, nothing seems to be going in. How can we get bored of studies? Well, like it or not, we have to do it. So, better enjoy while doing it. =D.
There are also few more things that might affect our studies, but MUST NOT GET DISTRACTED!!! For other things, I rather go with the flow. Its much easier that way. No worries till it actually hit you.
Its already 2 something am. Wrote so little in half an hour.. hehe.. have been watching the C walk and some Classical Gas. WOW, their guitar is awesome! This is real talent and skill. Thanks to Big John, this night ended with something different! =D

Here’s something about life,
Alan Bennett:
Life is rather like a tin of sardines - we're all of us looking for the key.

Monday, September 10, 2007



Another holiday is here. Will it be a fruitful holiday? Will there be anything special happening? Time flies. It has only been less then 15 months since I started college. Yet, many things have happened. Good things, bad things, things that don’t make sense, all cramped up in these time. Our ring of friends change, our approach to things change, our views changes, the things that we go through shape us and will make us who we are in future.

Getting hooked onto different things at different part of life, the way we look at things, the way we overcome it, those around that help us overcome it. This has made the bonding between our family members, the bonding with friends, and the bonding with all those around even closer then ever, and yet for some further apart. As we take ever step further into the future, we face new things; things that we never thought will be part of our lives. But yet, no matter what happens, God will make a way for us – either we continue to face it or we have to turn 180’ away from it. may it be good or be bad, there is always someone out there watching over us, praying for us, making sure that we analyze every move we make, guide us and protect us from harm.

Not expecting much for this holiday, just hope to have more badminton, more boling, more outing, more swimming maybe, and certainly some studies need to be done. And not forgetting longer period and more effective quite time, learn a bit more guitar and help out wherever I can. Not forgetting building a strong bond with those around us. =D

Friday, September 07, 2007

Invasion - a life without emotion

Invasion -  a life without emotion

Its once again after exam period. After a period of much interaction with books, we finally got to go out together for a movie, pool, also and boling-and I lost to Asvin!!! How is this possible?.. lol... Not to forget the most important part--- FOOD!!! It was a nice Sci-Fi movie. Asvin was covering her eyes most of the time though. Yen Ling is immune to all type of scariness, and Hari always acting macho as usual. But what is important is that we had lots of fun. =D

What would this world be if everyone has no emotion? No feeling? Fights, Nagging, Screaming, Sadness, Confusion, Frustration, etc… etc… None of the above. We might get use to it but would we not be bored? What is life without Happiness, Laughter? Is sadness bad? Are all fights bad? If life is without emotion, there won’t be any suspense, no excitement, no meaning to move on in life. No competition, no chance to express what you know, everyone the same—well, if everyone is the same, we might as well be penguins.. =p

Well, holidays are here, time to catch up with family, old friends, just having fun and not forgetting any of my studies.

*random blog about myself, cos some mentioned that I never talk much about myself in my blogs. =P

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Fears in relationship

Fears in relationship

There are many reasons why some people do not want to get involved in relationships. Is it because of fear? Or do we just enjoy being not in any relationships?

First, there is the fear of rejection. But in this, some might tell you that if you don’t face it, you’ll never find the answer. Some might also tell you that as long as you do not know it, it won’t hurt you. We do not want to be rejected by our friends, by our family, by people in our work place, by people that we always hang out with, in conclusion most people want to be accepted someway or another.

Commitment. The fear to be committed, do we and are we willing to commit our time, our energy, our earthly things… do we just want a relationship that we can get in and out freely, no strings attached, no barriers of entry and exit? Sometimes we might think that is it worth it? Where can we find true friendship when we are not willing to commit? When we are down, we expect someone to be there with us, but when our friends are down, are we as committed or can we be more commitment.

There is also the matter of security. Some might want to be in a relationship because they want security. It indeed feels good to feel safe with people around you. Some might not want to get involved in a relationship because they do not feel safe. But when the relationship is strong enough, there ought to be trust, and we will slowly stand up for people around us. Having the sense of security often give us a peace in mind.

Friends and people around might also influence us of who we are mixing with. We fear what people might say about us when we mix with different people. Are we made worse when we mix around with bad people? Are we less worthy to be with when we mix with unfortunate people? Are we less smart if we mix with underprivileged people? Are we more childish when we spend our time with little kids? Of cause we can choose who to be with and all, but we do not need to reject others because people around us reject them.

There’s another fear when we want to get into a relationship, we are often afraid that we are not good enough. We are afraid that our standard does not fit the people around us. This is the flaw and it leads people to not being themselves, being a fake person. But if our standard is not good enough, then its time to upgrade. We can’t stay in the mentality that we only want to mix with people of the same standard. We should be more volatile, able to mix with all types of people. There will always be a room of improvement. When we start to think that we are not good enough, then its time to put in more effort to improve.

There might be other barriers that causes fear to be in us when are mixing around. These might mean our culture, our religion, our family background, the generation gap, our environment… but we can’t always make this the excuse for us for not being friendly, for not wanting to mix around…

For every true relationship, there ought to have trust, loyalty, commitment, patience, hope… we must always have hope and not give up easily, we must be able to have to strength to move on, we must be able to decide wisely… All in all, the most important thing is that we must keep people around us in prayers. And also pray that we will mix with the right people. Surrender our relationship to God. We must also be strong and not shaken. All these fear shouldn’t always be the reason why we want to isolate ourselves. NO MAN IS AN ISLAND.

Wednesday, August 29, 2007

Getting back on track

Getting back on track

Getting used to routine, going through the things over and over again, using the same formula of life, tackling every difficulty that we face, with reasoning and deciding after much analysis. We are sometimes unfamiliar to changes. And often reluctant to leave our comfort zone.

The path is straight, with some bumpy roads; some turnings and sometimes we might face dead ends and might have to make a U-turn. When things go wrong and we are hit again and again, continuously, will we be like the tree that will stumble or are our roots planted deep enough that no matter what wind blow, we are able to come back to position?

There might be times that we are lost and can’t seem to decide, can’t seem to see any light in the darkness, can’t find the path in the jungle. There’s no wrong in staying in the jungle for a while before we find our path out of it, we might resort to waiting for help, and we might continue and wait and hope that a map will appear. But in the end, the important thing is that we have to find our way out.

There might be lots of people, giving various advices, pointing to different path, in the end, we have to decide on who to follow, how to follow and why are we following. We can also build our own path.

With everything around, the crowd, the noise, the wind, the cars… as long as we are able to stay focus, know what we want, and start to really ask and pray, we will find that there are no barriers among us and God, and are able to continue the journey. Being tied down with all the work and activities, we have less time; this is when we learn how to treasure time. Facing failures, this is when we learn how to climb back up.

When our tires are flat, put in more air, when it is wear off, change a new one. When the paints fade, repaint it. When we are bored with it, modify it. When we are less compatible, change the engine. No matter what happen, we have to use the best fuel to keep us going.

Tuesday, August 14, 2007



Some might say, "Life is like an onion. You peel it off one layer at a time; and sometimes you weep." Some might also say that "Life is like an onion; you peel off layer after layer and then you find there is nothing in it."

Things come and go. When good things come, we do not want it to go. But when bad things we just hope that it disappear immediately. But sometimes, it may seem that unfortunate events come and stay, and will not leave till we learn our lesson, or when we learn to out grow the difficulties that we are facing. When good things happen, we sometimes forget to be thankful and often overlook it. When it come to pass or when we down, only then will we start appreciating them.

But being an onion, we can either make others happy, putting flavor into their life or we can choose to make them cry. It’s a choice we can make. But when we are upset, we can also choose to make those around us frustrated or we can choose not to. Are onions good or bad for us? When things happen, we sometimes just need to sit and think all over about what went wrong.

Crying when we cut onions is nothing wrong. Only then we can see who really cares for us. But what can we do about the disappointment that some people just don’t care? Onions might sometimes seem fresh and juicy from the outside but are rotten and dried up in the inside. How many can tell the difference?

Onions come in varieties. Sometimes, more effort is needed to analyze it and sometimes we can just tell if it is good from the outside. Only when we start to appreciate it, we will know the properties of it. Evidence suggests that onions may be effective against the common cold, heart disease, diabetes, osteoporosis, and other diseases. (wikipedia)

** some of the things doesn’t make sense and can be ignored =D