My best friend

Quoting Aristotle “ BEST FRIEND is the man who in wishing me well wishes it for my sake”.

Through the walk on this earth, one may come across many people. Some you might just glance them through, some where you smile to, some where you greet, some where you keep in contact with, some where you hang out with, some where you share all your thoughts with.

One can have many friends. But there are different types of friends. Some are just termed friend because you know their name and they know yours. You might meet and chat with them once in a blue moon just because you have a common friend who hosted a party. Or just a simple smile and small chat when you bump into each other on the street.

There are also work friends. They are your friends because you see them every day, your work requires you to interact with them, or even work on the same project. They can be really good people who you get along with during office hours, perhaps a few cups of coffee throughout the year just because they are there. You may attend the same socials, but at the end of the day, you live your own separate lives.

Some of the friends may fall into the long distance relationship category. There are staying miles away. But when you see them, its like you’ve never been apart. Chats, laughter, exciting parties and activities. The bond continues for the period that you meet up and just cools off when you are far apart. Some on and off texts exchange and seasonal greetings would occur every year.

However, it is very difficult to find a friend where you contact with every day, share all your thoughts, moments, ups and downs with. This may be the role of a husband or a wife, where honesty lies, no barrier of communication in between these partners. Unlimited understanding and compromise is necessary for this to turn into a beautiful lasting relationship.

Distance, technology, interest, feelings, all these plays a part in how the friendship will turn out to be. Who do you turn to when you need someone to talk to, who do you turn to when you need a shoulder to cry on, who do you turn to when you just want a company who sits beside you?

We know what a best friend must do, but at times, it can be difficult for ourselves. The best friend in life that would never leave nor forsake you must be supernatural. We are humans, and humans fail at times, often unintentionally.

This blog shall end with the lyrics from the song “What a friend we have in Jesus”. Powerful and comforting lyrics.

What a friend we have in Jesus,
All our sins and griefs to bear!
What a privilege to carry
Everything to God in prayer!
Oh, what peace we often forfeit,
Oh, what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry
Everything to God in prayer!

Have we trials and temptations?
Is there trouble anywhere?
We should never be discouraged—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Can we find a friend so faithful,
Who will all our sorrows share?
Jesus knows our every weakness;
Take it to the Lord in prayer.

Are we weak and heavy-laden,
Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge—
Take it to the Lord in prayer.
Do thy friends despise, forsake thee?
Take it to the Lord in prayer!
In His arms He’ll take and shield thee,
Thou wilt find a solace there.

Blessed Savior, Thou hast promised
Thou wilt all our burdens bear;
May we ever, Lord, be bringing
All to Thee in earnest prayer.
Soon in glory bright, unclouded,
There will be no need for prayer—
Rapture, praise, and endless worship
Will be our sweet portion there.

Just a phase

Life is a journey that we walk through. Some give up half way through but still, there are many who are trying our best to make the best of our life. Are anything we do meaningful? Are we just living for this period on earth or is eternal life true as some of the religious teacher teachers us? Can you trust anyone unless you have been through that phase yourself?

Living life on earth has its ups and downs. The choices we make will pave the steps of where we will be in the future. What about the people who are clueless and have no idea of what we want in life? What influence our choices and decisions?

What are the things that influence our decisions? Sometimes, its just about living up to people’s expectation, sometimes we are too scared and prefer to take the easy way out, and yet sometimes we just want to try something different and exciting.

There are so many important choices that we make, we can either take the easy way out and follow the trend and the people around. Or we can stick to our gut and try to walk a road that we deem “right” for us. Whichever way we take, we can hardly see the other end of the path not taken. We can only comfort ourselves and believe that the one that we are taking now will turn out well. Continue to hope for a better tomorrow.

Life is a compromise

In life, sometimes we just can’t win it all. Have you ever thought that the painkillers that you take to relief your pain is actually harmful to the liver? However, if you don’t take the painkillers, the pain itself will be the harm.

Similar to our life. For example if a father is busy working outstation and is never at home, is he compromising his relationship with his family? But if he sits at home and not going to work, he might not be able to provide for the family up to the standard he wants to.

For students, if we only focus on studies and not going out for socials with our peers, is it healthy for our overall growth as a person?

Sometimes we will be torn into two. Our mind might want something and our heart might want another. How shall we decide? No matter what we choose, one of it has to take the sacrifice.

Well, we just need to make the decisions, asking God for wisdom, guidance, and a peace of mind. Having a loving family and friends around certainly will make things better. They might not know what you’re going through, but you know that they are always praying for your best. There will always be the “what if” question in life that will bug us, but we live with our decisions and try to make the best out of it.

“You are my hiding place; you will protect me from trouble and surround me with songs of deliverance. I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go. I will counsel you with my loving eye on you. …the Lord’s unfailing love surrounds the one who trusts in him.” Psalm 32

I'm a coconut

Expectation from people will somehow determine how we act and conduct ourselves. Maybe many of us are just like coconuts, we look all the same hanging off the tree.

Looking good from the outside, just green and happy, ready to sprout when we come in contact with water.

When people poke closer, they will come to the husks, we are just tolerating, let them poke, it wouldn’t hurt much, we are rather strong and can get through anything that comes our way. We are spongy, we bounce back easily.

But when people come too close or be too hostile, they will come to our shell, that’s the thing that is protecting us when people try to invade. We will be strong, throw us around, roll us around, we will stay strong.

However, for those who really know us, they will know what is inside us. Sweet sweet flesh and just sloshing sweet water ready to refresh anyone who really knows us.

Every strong coconut has a fragile side inside.

Logical Consideration

Human behaviour are hard to predict and quantify. How do we put a number to a risk assessment of human behavior. A person who you merry now might be the best choice for your life now. But can we guarantee that our love for our partner will never fade away? Or how can we be certain that our partners will stay faithful to us all the time? Knowing the risk will help us access the situation. There is no guarantee of a human behavior, but we can just wish for the best. If you never want to take the risk, you will just need to live without knowing how life might get when you’re together.

It is important to make necessary logical consideration when making life big choices. Choice of your studies is important. Of cause you can choose to change or switch courses along the way. But ideally, when you pick a major, it will help determine what type of career you are going to have. For example, if you are afraid of blood or do not like to interact with humans, do not choose medicine for your studies. And if you do not like mathematics and physics, do not choose engineering. If you think that you have made the wrong choice and its too late to turn back, it is only wise to make the best in the situation you are in. Continue to give your best and try to enjoy it as you go along.

Most people look at wedding as a life long journey. It is important to consider many aspect of this lifelong engagement and not just jump into marriage with your love at first sight or pressure from around. I’m not saying that love at first sight will not lead to a lasting marriage, but logic must take place in lifelong decision. Wedding vows are meaningful and it is worth looking at it over and over again when you have disagreement and fights, it will help you to remember why you choose to merry the other person in the first place.

No matter what choices we make, we need something to fall back unto if things do not work out. The only constant in life to me is the existence of God. All human can fail you or disappoint you but one thing in life that you can have peace holding on is the Father in heaven that will always love you, through thick and thin, through laughter and sorrows. This is how I find peace, this is the thing that keeps me going on, having a hope to carry on.

Change my world

As we grow up, many of us are trying to find ourselves. Our travels and experiences will expose us to different culture, and too many people with different attitude. There are places and people who makes our journey all jolly, meaningful and worthwhile. On the other hand, there are also people who will test your patience and bring out the dark side of you.

On this journey of finding ourselves, we might be evolving even as we speak. Our surroundings and who we surround yourself with will influence who we will be, though they might not change us entirely, it will slowly draw us to their likeness.

I am still finding myself. I might not know who I want to be in the future. But this journey has opened my eyes to know who I do not want to be. No one is perfect, and I am certainly far from perfection. But that’s the beauty of life, we can still choose to be who we want to be.

All you out there who are trying to find out who you are, don’t stop trying, continue to search for the attributes that you want in your life. Work on it and try to be a better self. Many will say that we cannot change the world. But since we are part of this world, we know that we can change this tiny bit of the world.

Not just a DREAMER

My last blog post was dated the year 2009, which is about 5 years ago. Where have I been, what have I been doing? Have my views changed? Am I the same, a better person or a horrible person compared to who I used to be? Well, there is no particular reason why I choose today to start writing again. Perhaps, I just want to share some of my thoughts, hoping to edify the readers or just hoping that by writing, I could reflect upon life itself.

This blog is solely my personal views and thoughts, it is not meant to criticise or judge anyone. So, if there is anything in it that hurts or provoke the readers, I do apologise in advance.

Well, I have encountered more than I used to 5 years ago, so my style of writing and thoughts would have changed one way or the other.

Here, it begins, some thought that I would like to share :

In the midst of busyness, perhaps it is good to take some time out to think about what we really want in life. All of us have certain dreams, vision or wants for our future. Maybe it is good to stop for a while and think, “What I am doing now, is it still relevant to my goals?”.

No doubt, goals changes as time pass. The things that you encounter in life and your surrounding will contribute to the decision that you make in life one way or the other. But are we still working towards our goals or have we given up and conform to the world that we are living in? Do we still have the strength to carry on running towards our goals or is it just easier to follow the flow and see where it leads?

For example, if your goal is to write a legendary computer game that will receive the most number of gamers in history; are you just sitting there hoping that it will happen? Are you spending most of your time in front of the television hoping that the game will miraculously write itself in your computer? Are you just browsing through Facebook, taking all sort of quizzes (don’t get me wrong, I enjoy Facebook and it helps me to just chill when there is too much on my mind)? Or ARE YOU DOING SOMETHING ABOUT IT?

Just sitting there and hope for things to happen is the most dangerous thing to do. “Hope - a feeling of expectation and desire for a particular thing to happen”. If you want it to happen (I mean positive things), do something and make it happen. Of cause, many things are not within our control. But if you do not give it your best, you will never know how far you can stretch.

What I am saying is, don’t just dream. Take the initiative to turn that dream into reality. Yes, we should have hope but don’t just hope. DO YOUR PART!

Sometimes, I find that I am wasting a lot of time. Then, I pause and think again, what are my dreams and goals in life? Are my actions and doings contributing to the path towards achieving them?

“Doing nothing for a while is called rest, but doing nothing for too long is just lazy”.

Put your hope in GOD, and give your best in life to bring Him glory! :)